"It is a little known fact that the undead are fond of cards, dice, and board games. You see, since they live forever, they have so much time to kill." - Brom Stoker, on his death bed; courtesy of the library of the Knowmordenudo Institute.
***"Can I get you something sir?" Carrington asked in a snooty voice as he set down the candelabra on the huge dining room table. He made sure to set it so that it illuminated the board better and to make it easier to see the deeds. "Perhaps I could bring you some refreshments?" he offered.
"Yes Carrington, I will have a patty melt and a Diet Coke. The Wolfman will have a leg of lamb with mint jelly. Frankenstein wants a meat lover's pizza with a bottle of Jack Daniels. The Mummy will have clam chowder and see if there is any of the key lime pie left will you? Have you got all that?"
"Yes sir, to the letter. I'll only be a moment," and Carrington bustled off.
"Now," Dracula sighed as he turned his attention back to the board, "Whose turn is it? Wolfman landed on Marvin's Gardens and Frank went to jail, so Mummy that makes it your turn."
"My pleasure," the Mummy's voice whispered like the wind blowing through dry leaves. He rolls a nine, rounds Go and lands on income tax. He has too much cash and property to try and pay the 10% so he just tosses his Go money into the pot in the middle. Dracula tries to roll the much coveted double fives to get out of jail and land on Free Parking in one fell swoop but he doesn't get it. He pays his fifty bucks into the pot and moves to Community Chest. Second prize at a beauty contest $10. While the Wolfman slowly counted out his move to Luxury Tax, Dracula looked around the table to see how his competition was shaping up.
The Mummy was a contender. He owned all of the cheap side of the board and had hotels on everything, not to mention a fair amount of cash. The Wolfman was in a strong position too. He had the reds with three houses each which amounted to a pretty steady income. Frankenstein however had been backed into a corner early on by spending so much time in jail while the other three had been snatching up properties left and right. Sure he had the railroads and the utilities, but with nothing he could develop, he was just walking the board and donating his money as he went. Dracula eyed his green ones with the couple of houses and hoped that it would be enough to eliminate the others and he would be crowned the victor in this Battle Royale of high finance.
It was Frankenstein's turn but he just sat there quietly, staring off at nothing in particular. The Mummy nudged him. "Oh I am sorry. I'm holding up the game aren't I?" Frankenstein said in his deep, baritone voice, "So sorry. I was wool gathering. I was just wondering which of us is the scariest? You know, just out and out fright-wise." Frankenstein rolled but remained in jail.
"You boob!" Dracula was so angry he stomped his foot. "Alright, give me the Doritos and start pouring the wine. And be quick about it!" He sat down in a resigned huff and proceeded to stain his fingers orange as he stuffed his face. "Anyway, that is my argument on why I am the scariest of us all," he said between mouthfuls, "Who's with me gentlemen?"
"I don't know that I would agree with you there," Carrington mumbled as he poured the wine.
"You have an opinion on this matter Carrington? Well please enlighten us!" Dracula taunted.