Friday, April 25, 2008

I'm In The Market For A New Horn, Got One?


I need a new horn for the Jeep. I would like it to have these options: Play a soundbite of Red Foxx from Sanford and Son saying, "You big Dummy!", Play a soundbite of Mr. T saying, "Get outta my way Fool!", and the regular horn.

If possible, I would like to add one soundbite more. Jimmy Stewart in Wincher '73 saying, "I never got a chance to use that rifle Mathew," followed by a hail of gunfire.

I only mention it because I had a friend who had a P.A. system hooked up to his bronco and he played this soundbite on a busy street corner on a summer Friday night at 9ish and we were almost arrested.

I think it might be handy to have the sound of rampant gunfire at your control, if for no other reason than the plain fact that people ignore flashing lights all the time, but if Bonnie and Clyde come down the street, they are the first ones to pull over.

Just think how much more satisfying it would be to travel the freeway and know that you could make it a point to call attention to all the dummies and fools who are on the road with you in the powerful, yet unique voices these actors provide.

Oh well, I'll just stick to the horn I have.

It just says "Fuck You" in esperanto.

Doc

7 comments:

  1. So I suppose a horn that plays Dixie like the General Lee is out? I've always been fond of horns that play La Cucaracha.

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  2. you know, those fine, helpful people down at Radio Shack have answers-- they say so when you answer th' fone!! Serious, a cheap MP3 player, some soundbites, a bullhorn under the hood with a wire tapped to the battery... It'd be good for you! A good, solid day's worth of tinkering will not only set U up right, but will make us manlymen at the Lodge downright jealous. Play yer cards right, and maybe you can get a cameo on th' Red Green show!!

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  3. My vote's for "Get outta my way Fool!". I want that one for myself.

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  4. I only have this horn that sticking out of my head. But it's actually half of a pair, so I really don't think I can give you one.

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  5. LOL Beckeye!

    I'd suggest somethingthat plays the Monday Night Foootball theme, butthat's just me...

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  6. LOL Beckeye!

    I'd suggest somethingthat plays the Monday Night Foootball theme, butthat's just me...

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  7. I always wanted one that sounded "Battle Stations" like in the Navy...

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