The Post You Will Never Read...

I usually don't put up a post on weekend because blogdom is as empty as school on Sunday. Everybody goes about the business of their lives and blogdom is only filled with the sound of crickets and the occasional tumbleweed blowing through.

I've gotten in the habit of leaving Friday's post up all weekend, as traffic seems to come to a grinding halt. On Monday, a few of your regulars will drop by, but unless you have put up something controversial or damn funny, your comments will be a little low. On Tuesday, things pick up a little bit as everyone is back into the swing of the work week by this time and they are looking for a little fun distraction that your blog so amply provides.

Wednesday is usually the high point and you should save your best piece of the week for then. Everybody and their brother drops by and says something funny or snarky, and your comments will most certainly reach at least double digits by then. I think that you get more traffic on Wednesday because it is the day furthest from the weekend. People are recalling the fun they had last weekend and are really longing for the good times that the coming one will hold. They want to touch base with you and check up on what you've written and snicker at your misadventures. They want to share in your signature goofiness, your delightful boobery, and your razor keen whit. They are, in a word, "game" for what you've got going on.

On Thursday, blogdom hits a fever pitch and the readers show up in droves with lots of chuckles and the occasional poke in the ribs because there is a grand sense of expectancy in our communal subconscious because there is only one more day of the work week until that magical Saturday & Sunday return.

On Friday, the expectation is too much and your readers will only drop by if they are trying to kill the last few minutes until quiting time and they've read every one's Friday update on Facebook. They do a quick skim down their blog roll and just pick out the juicy ones in between glancing at the clock and checking it against the time on their cell phone just to make sure it's right.

Saturday, they are off like a prom dress and leave a little cartoon dust cloud in their wake. Sunday, they sleep late and linger over their morning coffee. They flip through the Sunday paper but mostly they are headed to the comics or the sports page. Once this is done, they turn on the game and laze about until bed time. Sure, they sit in their pj's that they have worn all day and poke at the computer a little bit before getting their much needed rest, but it's only their Email and a quick game of Bejeweled on Facebook while they finish their last beer.

Then comes Monday and the cycle begins again. In the summer time Blogdom slows down even more but it makes up for it in the winter when an evening spent in front of the warm glow of the computer has more appeal. There is a certain ebb and flow to it, with the occasional eddy here and there. Now if you were to put up a post on a Sunday afternoon with a title that ran something like, "See me nude with a donkey" or "Fight fire with fire; I'm burning down the office so I don't have to go to work on Monday!", you may get a little more traffic than a usual Sunday, but don't bet on it.
In the immortal words of Short Round, "No time for love Doctor Jones!"

Doc