Dad's Night

My pal, Skyler's Dad, tagged me for a meme, and since I can refuse him nothing, here it is.

"The premise is that the wife is out that night and it's just you and the kids hanging out. What movies would you watch with them?" Well, my idea of Dad's night is that Flannery stays home with the kids while I sneak away to the Tiki bar for an evening of cold beer and warm friends, but that isn't the question at all.

As Flannery often has to travel and is gone for days at a time, this is a frequent ocurrance here. Given the chance, I would want to sit through The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly for the millionth time, but this is much too violent for two little girls, so we often settle for one of their favorites and not mine.

Lucy is fond of the Pink Panther (the cartoon, not the film) and Rocky & Bullwinkle. Riley likes Singing In The Rain or some Charlie Chaplin movies that we own. The Pawnshop is one of her favorites as well as Burlesque On Carmen.

Lately, we just sit down and watch Mythbusters, as all three of us can agree that it is the best thing ever put on television, bar none.

I don't think I'll be tagging anyone, as most of my readers are childless or ladies, but I would be interested in hearing what Cap'n Ergo Jinglebollocks has to add.

See you at the movies,
Doc

God Help Me, I've Quit Smoking

I must admit that some of the best advice I have ever received was from my pals Skyler's Dad and GetkristiLove. Skyler's Dad's was short and to the point, "Stop. Just Stop!" while GetkristiLove's was more optimistic and hopeful, "Think of all of the money you will save that you can spend on beer."

These two phrases have haunted me for the past few months to the point they are the only commercials that play in the Muzak of my head. Thanks to the both of you for haunting my conscience with your good advice. It took me a while, but I'm finally taking it.

I've known that I was poisoning myself for years, but as a young man that didn't seem to matter much. If I checked out because of some horrible self-induced disease, the world at large would not have lost much I reasoned. Well, now I'm a little older. I have a wonderful wife, two beautiful kids, and a good life. Why throw it away because I want to put dried leaves in my mouth and burn them?

I know that bad habits are hard to break, but I also know that in these hard times the only way I'm ever going to save enough money to put one of the kids through college is if I quit blowing it on stupid stuff like cigarettes, pixie sticks, and kiwi-scented shoe inserts. I may have to quit buying beer to put the other kid through college, but I don't think I'm quite ready to quit two things at once. My body couldn't handle it, and I might wind up in a bell tower somewhere throwing doughnuts at passersby while screaming insensibly. I can't let that happen. My arrest record is colorful enough.

If anyone has suggestions on how to kick this foul habit, I'd love to hear them, but in the mean time, can I bum a Lifesavers?

Doc

And Now It All Becomes Perfectly Clear...

I knew there was something haunting familiar about Skyler's Dad ever since he started popping up here at our little cyber-bar, almost as familiar as the avatar he uses. Tonight I figured it out.

He looks just like the stripper my brother hired for my bachelor party ten years ago. She had the exact same beard, wore the exact same costume that you see pictured above, had the exact same kooky sense of humor, and while I've never heard Skyler's Dad speak, I suspicion that their voices would sound exactly the same as they said, "Do not touch!"

While I am astonished at this facinating piece of synchronicity, somehow I think Skyler's Dad would look better in the pasties, and wouldn't need help with the straps on his overalls.

Doc