
The sign down the street says: Barney's Bar & Grill. Under new management; now open at 10 AM. I think they are trying to attract the "earlybirds". I know I start craving a beer and some pickled eggs at about 10 AM. How about you?
The sign on the church down the street says: Stop, Drop, & Roll won't help you in Hell! I don't know. You might just roll into some very interesting people. With any luck, they will be attractive and will want to continue sinning with you!
The sign down the street says: Horse Poo 50 cents. Makes a great gift!
Phrases I love and am always looking for a way to work into any conversation:
"Well that will put lead in yer pencil!"
"Let's run that up the flag pole and see who salutes it."
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
"Want to see the dimples on my butt?"
"I laughed so hard I coulda farted feathers!"
"Well there's your problem right there..."
"Could you get me a beer?"
Doc