Drinking Games

The drinking game is almost as old as the drink itself. I'm sure that the first guy to come up with the magic formula to convert sugar to alcohol immediately came up with a game to convince his buddies to drink it. I'm sure it came down to a "double dog dare you", but however it happened, we have been trying to make a sport of it ever since.

I think most all of us could name some kind of drinking game, as there are only just so many variations on an old theme. The race, the amount, as well as the social and the skill games.

The race involves a large amount of drink, or drinks, and the first one finished is declared the winner. The amount competitions are the worst, as it just becomes progressively uglier, as two or more people drink themselves blind.

The Skill games hinge on the fact that your reflexes slow with your consumption of alcohol, as well as your balance, hand-eye coordination, and your ability to perform sexually. Quarters is a good example of a skill game, as you have to bounce a quarter into a cup and make some one else drink the drink. If you fail, you have to drink. The object of the game is to stay as sober as you can while making your competitors drunk. By joining the game, you have already lost.

The social games usually involve cards (Bullshit) or dice (Mexican dice or Asshole), and in some instances T.V. (have you ever played "Hi Bob" while watching Newhart?) A group of people sit down to consume alcohol but do it by a set of rules, using some random generator, and the games call for very little skill.

Of all of them, I have only played Quarters, and only once. It was on a church outing in a Columbus hotel room with about fifteen other under-age Christians. We filled the tub with ice and lots of Old Milwaukee, and played Quarters until the wee hours. The next day we really needed coffee, and the last thing we needed was a sermon on vice.

The other games I've never played, but I have witnessed them being played, and played poorly. I could never understand the gluttony of it. Why ruin a perfectly good beer by trying guzzle it? And at what point in the evening did you set the goal for yourself to be the last one to barf? No, I think I'd rather sit back and enjoy a cold one and chat with my friends and enjoy their company, rather than pour three gallons of drink down my gullet.

I know. I drank with the preacher's son.

Doc